STRENGTH
-Using parts of the heroes journey chart.
-Explaining in detail what happens.
Using parts of the hero's journey made my paper structured and turned it into an actually story and explaining in detail makes the reader understand the story a lot clearer.
WEAKNESS
-Story is all over the place and jumps from situation to situation.
-I could of expanded on my ideas.
It seemed like i jumped around with my story fairly quick which throws the reader off. I also could have expanded on ideas and cut out some of the ideas that were not important. In order to make this better im going to have to get rid of some of the less important parts of the story and further expand on the parts of the story that i find to interest the reader.
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